Sunday, March 15, 2015

15 Reasons my House Might Not be Clean Today

I love a clean house. Sparkling tile, clutter-free counters, and beds neatly made. And, when my house is spotless, I like to sit down and enjoy it….for about one minute. After all, it won’t take long before somebody spills juice and drops their toast, peanut butter side down, on the floor. Here are a few other reasons my house might not be clean today.

My Toddler Threw Something Down the Toilet

A while back, my then-toddler threw a bath toy and a building block down the toilet. This caused a few overflow incidents. I don’t know about you, but it grosses me out to have toilet water on the ground. Even after having a plumber come, the toilet was never the same. Thus, recently we invested in a new super flusher toilet. The toilet is only a month old and I have been policing the area to make sure nothing gets flushed that shouldn’t be flushed. 

My Children Think I’m a Ride 

Sometimes when I’m crouched over cleaning my baseboards, my kids think it’s an opportunity to get a free piggy back ride.  This makes the cleaning process go much more slowly. I tell them not to jump on my back because mommy isn’t that young anymore!

Bath Time got a Little Crazy

Bath time at my house sometimes reminds me of being in the soak zone at "The Shamu Show".  After the show is over, there are usually water droplets on the mirror, a drenched bath mat, and, for the encore, some pee on the ground.  

Having kids = having messes! Click to Tweet:

My Preschooler Likes Pouring Juice “All by Myself”

I like to encourage independence but sometimes that leads to messes. For some reason, my youngest just has to fill up his glass to the brim and then slosh half of it onto the tablecloth. 


Crumbs, crumbs….they are everywhere. With one little step, a cracker can be turned into a 100 little orange pieces.  

Someone Bought my Kids a Bunch of Building Blocks for Christmas

I think building blocks are great. However, when all of the ankle-twisting toys are on the ground, it looks like the aftermath of two moms fighting over, and ripping open, the last bulk Lego set for $10 on Black Friday.  Luckily, it’s pretty easy for kids to clean up and we have bins for all the toys. 

My Children Decided to Do a Mud Run

My kids like to make mud pies, dig, and plant flowers. It’s fun but when my kids are done, they look like they competed in a Mud Run. When they are not in the mud, we're at the beach or the park. Sand is almost worse than mud. Even when I use the baby powder trick and make my kids take their shoes off at the door, a little sand seems to sneak inside. I think I need an outdoor shower. 

A Box of Cereal was Left Out

There is something enticing about a big box of something on the counter. It’s so enticing that little ones want to reach up and grab it. Unfortunately, it can take a long time to clean up bits of cereal all over the ground.    

Animals, Kids, and Pizza

My cat is on a special raw food diet. This means he is often hungry.  In the event that one of my children leave the refrigerator open, the cat is all over it.  Last time this happened, the cat decided to grab my daughter’s leftover pizza out of the fridge.  Pizza=sick cat.  No further explanation needed.

Someone had a Potty Accident

The last room of carpet is going bye-bye this week. There have been enough potty accidents and norovirus over the last six years that I don’t really trust my spot remover to remove it.  With laminate and tile, when I clean up, I know I’ve gotten rid of all of the bodily fluids. 

Parmesan Cheese

I know I said I didn’t like crumbs but did I mention I hate parmesan cheese? Well I’m the only one in my family. The rest of them like to create cheesy mountains of the stuff on their pizza, spaghetti, and sometimes toast. Unfortunately parmesan cheese has an uncanny ability of ending up on the floor and in little cracks on dining room chairs. 

My Washing Machine is On Strike

Sometimes I think my washing machine is mad at me. I'm constantly throwing clothes soiled with boogers, mud, sand, and vomit into it. It never gets a day off.  So it will just break on me. In the time it takes me to call out a repairman and fix it, I'll develop an Everest-like mountain of dirty clothes.  

We Baked

actually love baking with my kids. What I don't love is the traces of flour that silently drift to the floor or when my preschooler gets carried away with the cinnamon.  

Someone Drew a Mural

I'm not really sure why I thought purchasing non-washable crayons was a good idea. I don't even think I remember purchasing them….until they were on my wall. Washable crayons are so much easier to clean off.  Lesson learned. 


Drips of honey on the ground are magnets for animal hair. I have four animals so it doesn’t take long for a drip of honey to look like a hairy mole. 

I'm so happy I cleaned my house today but I know I don't have long before it looks like this:

What are some reasons your house is messy today? Or, what is your best tip for keeping your house clean with kids?

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